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In many ways, today’s debate about same-sex marriage resembles earlier debates about interracial marriage. I’ve drawn this analogy myself. In at least two ways, however, the situations differ. From the discriminator’s standpoint, opposing same-sex marriage is more defensible. At the same time, from the target’s standpoint, it’s more oppressive.
From the perspective of a would-be spouse, being denied the right to
same-sex marriage can be, in some ways, worse. If you’re attracted to
someone of another race, and the law won’t let you marry anyone of that
race, you can find someone of your own race to marry. You shouldn’t have
to do that, but you can. But if you’re exclusively attracted to people
of your own sex, and the law forbids you to marry such a person, then
everything conservatives praise about marriage—the sharing, the happiness, the fulfillment, the solemnity, the respect—is denied to you.
